The Lit.cat is an online literary magazine that keeps each issue within a single, scrollable page at a reading length under half an hour. This week's issue features a 60% chance of loss in body symmetry, five love poems, and four existentialist parables. It also features three paws, two PhDs, and one fat, old, beyond unfuckable man. It will take around 29 minutes and 46 seconds to read in its entirety, which will fill the recommended amount of daily reading time for elementary school children and help them earn a free book at their next school book fair.